I got real and this is what happened...
đ´ââ ď¸Ahoy Shitshows!
Last Sunday, I reached out to a fellow traveler and got real.
I got really real. I got really raw. I got really vulnerable.
I shared my shame. I shared my pain. I shared that I felt alone. I shared that I felt like I have no fucking clue what Iâm doing in so many areas of my life. I shared I need help and that Iâm not really sure what help looks like.
The following day, she offered to be a mentor in both business and recovery. And it felt like answered prayer - the help that I needed but wasnât quite sure what it looked like.
And ensued was that I had an amazing week - one of the best weekâs I have had in a LONG ASS TIME. And I made a lot of progress (more on that in a bitâŚ).
This morning, I pulled a card from Gabby Bernsteinâs Spirit Junkie Deck. Before I pulled it, I asked God to please give me a message that I need to receive. This is the card I pulledâŚ
And then it hit me⌠the reason that I had such a good week was because I felt safe.
I felt a level of safety that I hadnât experienced in a long time. I felt a comfortability in my own skin that I hadnât experienced in a long time.
And the reason I felt safe was because I opened up - I got real and raw and vulnerable - I acknowledged that I needed help - and then the Universe provided.
Here are my takeaways from the week that I would like to share with youâŚ
Itâs hard to make progress if we donât feel safe.
Safety comes when we bare our soul to someone who is safe.
Safety comes when we acknowledge we need help, ask for it, and then accept the help that the our Higher Power offers.
And lasty, progress occurs through baby steps. And progress is also things that we may not typically acknowledge as progress.
Here is what progress looked like for me this weekâŚ
Asking for help
Taking a 10 minute walk without my phone 3 days this week
Not ordering any takeout Monday-Friday - I made all meals at home
I made a to-do list each morning - at the end of each day, I celebrated the things I got done and didnât beat the shit out of myself for the stuff I didnât get done (everyday there were several things I didnât get done)
I didnât shame myself when I played way too much Candy Crush on ThursdayâŚ
Yesterday I was able to acknowledge when I was anxiously cleaning to avoid looking at my bank activity for the week and that my inner child wasnât feeling safe. I told her the finances are not her responsibility, that she is safe and taken care of (and then looked at my bank statement)
I spent less than an hour writing this newsletter (instead of obsessing and overthinking it for hours, and then not sending anything out because it wasnât perfect)
On Friday, I asked the members of The Shitshow to share their wins for the week, hereâs some of the things what they sharedâŚ.
âI started prioritizing things I enjoy, reading, giving my houseplants overdue care and playing a little bit of a video game.â
âI had a vulnerable discussion with my sister about our childhood. Things we have never talked about before. It felt so healing, I hope we can have more discussions.â
âI had a ârun inâ with a coworker this week. I had zero to do with his issue, he just needed someone to unload on. I stayed detached and unbothered. He was a jerk and Iâm owed an apology, but the old me would have taken all the blame, lost sleep, and considered quitting after something like that. There is something very empowering about realizing this had nothing to do with me. Iâm happy with how I handled it.â
âI gave myself permission to be imperfect .....yesterday at 2:10pm.... for 3 minutes!!â
âI showed up for my therapy session and all three support group meetingsâ
âI babysit my grandchildren for two days and allowed my inner child to help me. I allowed myself to truly enjoy spending the time with them and put the authoritative hat down. I made a conscious effort to get on their level and look at things through their eyes. I even let them eat Doritos in my bed. Haha đâ
On that note⌠itâs time you just DAMN THE JOIN SHITSHOW! How can you read this shit and not want to be a part of this AMAZING community. Just do it already!
And also make sure you listen to this weekâs episode if you havenât already
EP 156 - Addicted to Negative Excitement: Decluttering Your Life w/ Andrea Wait
SHITSHOW SATURDAY #99 - Critical Parent (and my candy crush addiction...)
In closing, here are some pics from my hot date last night with Kiki, pizza, and a jigsaw puzzle!
